Wink from Heaven: Happy birthday Caleb

Sunday, January 20, 2013

Happy birthday Caleb

Janauary 6th was Caleb's birthday.

He would have been eight years old.

It was a sweet day to begin some traditions that will always be special for us.

We gave each of the boys a trunk with a special note from Caleb.

The note told them that each year on his birthday they would get something meaningful to put in their trunk to help them feel close to heaven.

In their trunks they found the DVD slide show we played at Caleb's funeral, a wink magnet, a copy of Caleb's funeral program and a DVD of Dallan's BYU devotional talk.

(you can watch it here or read it here)

Caleb's note also told them that each year the family would receive a present that would help us make a happy memory together! This year we got a new board game to play! (Caleb knows we love to play games :)

The note ended with a challenge for the boys to find a way to share a wink with someone and care for them in the same way they took such good care of him.

For church that day Dallan and the boys wore a tie tack with the letter C on it. They were a special Christmas gift from Caleb's nurse and our dear friend, Hailey. They loved having a quiet way to have Caleb close to their hearts.

I love imagining my boys taking this tie tack with them on their missions and taking the opportunity to tell their investigators about Caleb then bearing their testimonies of eternal families.

I know Caleb will be a special missionary companion for his brothers throughout their lives.

We were touched by the ways Caleb was remembered on his special day. My family knew it was too cold to bring flowers to his grave, so they brought flowers to us instead.

We went to the cemetery right before the sun went down. It was cold, but so beautiful. We sang happy birthday to Caleb and thought of a way we would share a wink this year. Then we let our balloons go.

Heaven was here. Caleb was close. Our hearts were filled.

When we returned home we lit Caleb's birthday cake and watched a picture slide show while we ate. It was sweet to hear our boys giggle as they watched pictures of them growing up with Caleb.

We miss Caleb every day.
We rejoice in the miracle of seven years.
And we thank our Savior Jesus Christ for making it possible for us to be a forever family.

As we Celebrate Caleb, we celebrate Him.

Happy birthday sweet Caleb.

We love you forever.

9 comments:

Ashley Baadsgaard Worthen said...: How sweet. I love all of those wonderful and meaningful ways you celebrated his birthday. You have such a sweet way of mothering your cute boys. I'm sure Caleb was there to help blow out the candles. :) Love you.; January 20, 2013 at 3:31 PM
Lisa said...: That will be such a special tradition for you all. Happy Birthday Caleb.; January 20, 2013 at 4:48 PM
Jennie said...: I love all the ways you chose to celebrate Caleb and his special day. These will be sweet memories for your family and something for them to look forward to with each passing year. Much love to you!; January 20, 2013 at 6:47 PM
Junior said...: beautiful, such a special tradition. Happy Birthday in heaven Caleb, we love you.; January 20, 2013 at 9:10 PM
Rebecca Jackson said...: Happy Birthday Caleb!; January 21, 2013 at 10:20 PM
Kayla said...: Just read your beautiful story on thegiftofgivinglife.com. I love how you are helping your boys to remember Caleb- it's so positive and sweet! I also really loved how you were able to use the Atonement to find peace and strength- your experience helped me to understand the Atonement better! Thank you so much for being willing to share!!; January 22, 2013 at 2:09 PM
The Kings said...: So beautiful. What a special way to celebrate his birthday. Love to you all xxx; February 1, 2013 at 1:28 AM
Jenny said...: Happy Birthday Caleb. You are so loved.; February 17, 2013 at 10:41 PM
The 5 Disney Lovers said...: That is such a sweet post April. Love you.; February 18, 2013 at 6:38 AM

Prayer for Caleb

(written by Caleb's Grandma in her weekly column -2008-)

In my family we have a secret code to communicate our love for each other when we are out in public. We wink. When one of us is about to perform or speak, we look for a family member’s face in the crowd. Then we wink at each other. Closing one eye and winking is our secret code for saying, “I love you. You can do it. You’re wonderful.”

About three years ago, my grandson Caleb was born into our family. He must have known before birth that he would never be able to speak to us because he was born with one eyelid permanently closed. So, he is always “winking” at us, always communicating, “I love you. You can do it. You’re wonderful.”

Caleb has one eye lid permanently closed because he is missing one of his eyes . . . and he is also missing his brain. All the doctors said he would die soon after birth. They were wrong. Caleb is three years old. He is a medical miracle. The doctors say he can’t see, hear, speak, think or move. Those who know and love Caleb understand he has his own unique way of experiencing the world and communicating his love to those around him.

After Caleb was born the hospice people told us to buy a burial plot and continually warned us of his imminent death. We soon learned you can not live well in a state of fear and sadness. We decided we could spend Caleb’s entire life anxious and scared he might die at any moment, or we could celebrate each day we were blessed to have him with us. In the beginning, my daughter April celebrated Caleb’s birthday every week instead of every year with balloons and cupcakes because we simply did not know how long we would have him with us. We stopped the cupcakes after we gained ten pounds, but the celebrating goes on.

We all prayed for a miracle when we first learned about Caleb’s condition. We got one. Caleb’s birth, life and mission have had a deep and lasting impact on our lives. His spirit, eternal identity and most of all the loving, individual relationship he has with each of us is truly a miracle. Because of Caleb we know that each of us has a divine purpose and that the physical body is a sacred gift we should never take for granted. We better understand the worth of a soul and the resiliency of the human spirit.

Caleb’s five year old brother Matthew said, “Grandma. The doctors said Caleb was going to die, but he didn’t. That’s the first miracle I ever saw!”

Sometimes Caleb’s baby brother Mitchell pulls out his feeding tube while they hold hands riding together in their double stroller. Sometimes the only intervention that can get Caleb’s heart rate up is when his older brothers Josh and Matty crawl in his crib, hug him and sing, “I am a Child of God.” ...If you have a moment please offer a prayer for the little boy who has never been able to utter a single word and yet has taught everyone who knows and loves him – all the secrets of a rich and meaningful life.