Wink from Heaven: January 13, 2005

Thursday, January 13, 2005

January 13, 2005

Hi our sweet family!
We just wanted to let you know the latest on our little angel boy, Caleb.
Our hearts are so full and tender as we get to spend these precious times with our little sweetheart.
One of my favorite days was Tuesday. Our doctor let me, Dallan and the boys take Caleb into a hospice room, and Josh and Matthew were able to see Caleb for the first time! Normally no children under age 18 are allowed, but our sweet doctor has been so kind to consider the needs of our little family during this time. Josh and Matthew were so excited and I was so touched as I watched them hold and interact with their little brother. Josh was so tender with Caleb and just couldn't stop hugging him and rubbing his face against Caleb's face. His little spirit was so full of joy to be with his baby brother. He didn't want to put him down. Matthew was so excited not to be "the littlest" anymore and just loved holding Caleb! He couldn't wipe the smile off of his face, and he loved playing with Caleb's little fingers. The boys were able to hold and snuggle their baby for two whole hours. As parents, our hearts were so touched to have such a special time together, because even when he's home, Caleb will have to spend most of his time under an oxygen mask.
The past few days have been really full as we've been learning how to use all of the hospice equipment so that we can take care of Caleb at our home. He will be coming home tomorrow (Friday). We are so excited to get to be near Caleb everyday! We know that even though we are overwhelmed with how we will be able to keep up with 24 hour care, our family is so blessed to have this little miracle in our lives.
We are so thankful for your prayers and for the many ways that you have shown your love for us over these past few days.
Thanks for opening your hearts to us

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Prayer for Caleb

(written by Caleb's Grandma in her weekly column -2008-)

In my family we have a secret code to communicate our love for each other when we are out in public. We wink. When one of us is about to perform or speak, we look for a family member’s face in the crowd. Then we wink at each other. Closing one eye and winking is our secret code for saying, “I love you. You can do it. You’re wonderful.”

About three years ago, my grandson Caleb was born into our family. He must have known before birth that he would never be able to speak to us because he was born with one eyelid permanently closed. So, he is always “winking” at us, always communicating, “I love you. You can do it. You’re wonderful.”

Caleb has one eye lid permanently closed because he is missing one of his eyes . . . and he is also missing his brain. All the doctors said he would die soon after birth. They were wrong. Caleb is three years old. He is a medical miracle. The doctors say he can’t see, hear, speak, think or move. Those who know and love Caleb understand he has his own unique way of experiencing the world and communicating his love to those around him.

After Caleb was born the hospice people told us to buy a burial plot and continually warned us of his imminent death. We soon learned you can not live well in a state of fear and sadness. We decided we could spend Caleb’s entire life anxious and scared he might die at any moment, or we could celebrate each day we were blessed to have him with us. In the beginning, my daughter April celebrated Caleb’s birthday every week instead of every year with balloons and cupcakes because we simply did not know how long we would have him with us. We stopped the cupcakes after we gained ten pounds, but the celebrating goes on.

We all prayed for a miracle when we first learned about Caleb’s condition. We got one. Caleb’s birth, life and mission have had a deep and lasting impact on our lives. His spirit, eternal identity and most of all the loving, individual relationship he has with each of us is truly a miracle. Because of Caleb we know that each of us has a divine purpose and that the physical body is a sacred gift we should never take for granted. We better understand the worth of a soul and the resiliency of the human spirit.

Caleb’s five year old brother Matthew said, “Grandma. The doctors said Caleb was going to die, but he didn’t. That’s the first miracle I ever saw!”

Sometimes Caleb’s baby brother Mitchell pulls out his feeding tube while they hold hands riding together in their double stroller. Sometimes the only intervention that can get Caleb’s heart rate up is when his older brothers Josh and Matty crawl in his crib, hug him and sing, “I am a Child of God.” ...If you have a moment please offer a prayer for the little boy who has never been able to utter a single word and yet has taught everyone who knows and loves him – all the secrets of a rich and meaningful life.