Wink from Heaven: The Brother Bag

Thursday, November 5, 2009

The Brother Bag

I love to watch my boys spend special brother time with Caleb every day. They each have their favorite things to do with him...read a story, rub his feet, brush his hair...
but sometimes they like to have an idea.
So, I decided to make a special brother bag.
Each week I'll put 4 or 5 special objects in it
so that they can have some ideas how to interact with Caleb!

I'm trying to include a story to read, something he can feel, something he can hear, and a toy or puppet that is visually exciting.
Yesterday I watched Matthew squishing play dough into Caleb's hands, and I knew that the brother bag was here to stay!

7 comments:

Becky said...: OOOHHHHH!!! I LOVE it. :) You are so creative. Aside from playdough...Stevie loves to squish floam into Ben's hands, have you ever felt floam? It's FUN!; November 5, 2009 at 5:05 PM
Kel said...: What a wonderful idea!; November 5, 2009 at 7:29 PM
arianne said...: This is such a fantastic idea. I love that puppet too, by the way. Where do you find your puppets?; November 5, 2009 at 7:43 PM
Lisa Christine said...: I love this idea, I really, really do! In fact, I might have to borrow it....but instead, it will be called a sister bag :); November 5, 2009 at 8:25 PM
April said...: Arianne, I've purchased a lot of my puppets from Costco- and I've found some great ones at yard sales :)!!!; November 6, 2009 at 6:54 AM
Ashley Dawn said...: What a great idea. He's so lucky to have a mother like you...; November 6, 2009 at 8:02 AM
Rebecca Jackson said...: What a fantastic idea! I love how you are taking an active roll in assuring that all of your boys have a brotherly bond.; November 6, 2009 at 8:09 PM

Prayer for Caleb

(written by Caleb's Grandma in her weekly column -2008-)

In my family we have a secret code to communicate our love for each other when we are out in public. We wink. When one of us is about to perform or speak, we look for a family member’s face in the crowd. Then we wink at each other. Closing one eye and winking is our secret code for saying, “I love you. You can do it. You’re wonderful.”

About three years ago, my grandson Caleb was born into our family. He must have known before birth that he would never be able to speak to us because he was born with one eyelid permanently closed. So, he is always “winking” at us, always communicating, “I love you. You can do it. You’re wonderful.”

Caleb has one eye lid permanently closed because he is missing one of his eyes . . . and he is also missing his brain. All the doctors said he would die soon after birth. They were wrong. Caleb is three years old. He is a medical miracle. The doctors say he can’t see, hear, speak, think or move. Those who know and love Caleb understand he has his own unique way of experiencing the world and communicating his love to those around him.

After Caleb was born the hospice people told us to buy a burial plot and continually warned us of his imminent death. We soon learned you can not live well in a state of fear and sadness. We decided we could spend Caleb’s entire life anxious and scared he might die at any moment, or we could celebrate each day we were blessed to have him with us. In the beginning, my daughter April celebrated Caleb’s birthday every week instead of every year with balloons and cupcakes because we simply did not know how long we would have him with us. We stopped the cupcakes after we gained ten pounds, but the celebrating goes on.

We all prayed for a miracle when we first learned about Caleb’s condition. We got one. Caleb’s birth, life and mission have had a deep and lasting impact on our lives. His spirit, eternal identity and most of all the loving, individual relationship he has with each of us is truly a miracle. Because of Caleb we know that each of us has a divine purpose and that the physical body is a sacred gift we should never take for granted. We better understand the worth of a soul and the resiliency of the human spirit.

Caleb’s five year old brother Matthew said, “Grandma. The doctors said Caleb was going to die, but he didn’t. That’s the first miracle I ever saw!”

Sometimes Caleb’s baby brother Mitchell pulls out his feeding tube while they hold hands riding together in their double stroller. Sometimes the only intervention that can get Caleb’s heart rate up is when his older brothers Josh and Matty crawl in his crib, hug him and sing, “I am a Child of God.” ...If you have a moment please offer a prayer for the little boy who has never been able to utter a single word and yet has taught everyone who knows and loves him – all the secrets of a rich and meaningful life.